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My sister came up with this idea.  I kind of like the idea, but not enough to do a multi-chapter fic.  So what you are getting is the good parts version.  Just the interesting pieces I came up with, without the necessary connective portions.  So, you will jump from scene to scene, and hopefully from joke to joke.

If you are not familiar with Sailor Moon, this will be pretty boring.  I don’t explain much about the characters, so you need to know them going in.

Anywho, here it is

Pirates (the good parts version)

“There she is.”

Malachite turned to look out over the bow, following his Captain’s gaze.  A large ship lay on the horizon.   The Tsuki was carrying a load of gold and they were going to relieve it of its burden.

“Jedite, intercept course.”  Malachite ordered.

“Aye, sir.”


Malachite pulled his sword free and watched another body fall.  The deck was littered with dead men; he turned to defend against the next sword aimed at his back.  He cursed silently as sweat ran into his eye.  The battle was fierce; the crew was defending their ship with everything they had.  It shouldn’t be such a protracted engagement.  He had long lost count of the ships they had raided since his prince had taken to the sea as a rogue pirate.  Most fell swiftly when confronted by their seasoned warriors.

This… this was something else.  What prize lay deep in the bowels of the ship that they defended so passionately?  It had better be worth all the lives they were losing in the attempt.

Finally The Tsuki’s crew was subdued.

“Search the ship.” Captain Darien ordered.  “Find the treasure.”


“I’m sorry, Captain.” Nephrite bowed before Darien.  “There is no sizable amount of gold found.  Just some random items among personal items.”

The remaining crew and passengers were gathered on the deck.  Captain Darien drew his sword and marched over to the captain of The Tsuki.  Placing the blade against the man’s throat.  “Tell me where the treasure is or die.”  Darien’s eyes were dark and unblinking.  No one doubted his sincerity.

“NO!” screamed a voice.  A young woman in a white gown lunged forward toward the captain.  A group of women quickly pulled her back shielding her with their bodies.

Darien’s gaze followed to the girl, watching her intently.  He moved toward her.  The group tightened around her.  A blonde woman placed herself firmly in front of the whimpering girl.  Glaring at Darien, she didn’t back down as he approached.

“If you want to save his life,” Darien said coldly.  He spoke to the blonde, but his eyes were focused on the trembling girl behind her. “Then tell us where you are hiding the treasure?  We know “The Treasure of the Kingdom” is on this ship.”

The woman stood her ground.  “All we have is right here.  There is nothing hidden.”

“Then if this is all you have to offer, I’ll be taking her.”  Darien lifted his sword.

“Princess,” the captain gasped.

Everyone on the deck stilled.

“Princess?” Malachite asked.  No wonder they hadn’t been able to find the treasure.  If the Moon Kingdom was sending their princess across the ocean, it was a bounty beyond measure.

The blonde’s chin rose, “That’s right.” she said.  Her eyes spit fire, “and my ladies in waiting stay with me.”

Darien’s eyes finally met the princess’s.  “Fine.”  He turned, walking to Malachite.  “Take them all.”


Malachite was relieved to find the Officer’s Galley empty as he entered.  No one was there to see him limp over to the liquor cabinet.  He poured himself a large sniffer of brandy.  Carefully he settled himself into a chair.

It had been two weeks since they set The Tsuki free to take the ransom demand to the Moon Kingdom.

The women were on board their ship in separate rooms.  The Captain had taken the girl with pigtails to his own room and they had placed the others in a room together. Two days and four escape attempts later they were forced to separate them.  Malachite was frustrated; the attempts would have all succeeded if they hadn’t been determined to take the other girl with them.

Now, each officer had a girl under his personal watch.  Malachite was given the task of caring for the princess.  Mina was crafty and passionate.  No matter how he bound her, she found a way to escape.  Every time he entered the room he had to watch out for an ambush.  He couldn’t even sleep in his own bed.  One evening, after binding her arms and legs, he lay down to sleep, only to wake being suffocated by his pillow.  Another night she braided some of his hair into a rope and attempted to strangle him.

Malachite would have laughed at his ridiculous predicament, if it didn’t hurt so much to breath.  Mina’s elbows and knees were violent weapons.

The door opened, Nephrite shuffled in, sinking into a chair.  His face sported new bruises; his left eye was nearly swollen shut.

“Drink?” Malachite asked.

“No,” Nephrite mumbled out of the corner of his mouth.  His lips were split in multiple places; most were scabbed over, but wouldn’t be healing unless the man stopped trying to kiss the amazon in his care.

“I thought you were keeping Lita tied up?”

Nephrite sighed.  “I am.  This…” He reached up and gently touched the swollen eye, wincing, “is from her head butting me when I tried to take her hair down.”

Malachite shook his head.  He was blessed and cursed with his own charge.  Oh, he wanted to touch Mina as much as Nephrite did Lita, but Mina was the princess.  If they wanted to collect the ransom, he couldn’t touch her.  He didn’t get any nearer to the princess then absolutely necessary.  Not trusting her or himself.

The door opened admitting Jedite.  He walked with stiff dignity to the brandy bottle.  Not bothering with a glass, he grabbed the bottle with his one good hand, bringing it back to the table, where he proceeded to drink it straight.

Malachite observed that there were fresh blood stains on the bandaged arm.

They sat in silence while Jedite drank.  Finally he slammed the bottle down.  “Where does a naked woman keep finding knives?” he asked the room, not wanting or expecting an answer.

“Did you search her hair?” Zoicite asked coming in to take a seat.

“I searched her entire body.” Jedite shifted in his chair wincing.  “And paid for every touch.”

Of them all Zoicite was the only one not sporting any bruises.  His pale skin practically glowed in the candle light.

“How is yours?” Nephrite asked.  He might have been frowning, but it was hard to tell through the swelling.

Zoicite smirked.  “She is quiet and gentle.  There is a very quick mind hidden behind those spectacles.”  The smile slipped and he swallowed thickly.  “She asks lots of subtle questions.”  His breathing became shallower.  “Walking me in conversational circles, looking for what she wants.”  Malachite watched as sweat started to trickle down Zoicite’s face.  “I think… she knows…” Zoicite said, his words coming in gasping bursts.  His eyes widened, his skin taking on a green tinge.  “…who we are.”

Standing abruptly, Zoicite lunged across the room to a bucket in the corner.  He retched violently.

“I think… she may… have… put something in my tea.”  Zoicite said softly, before returning to vomiting.

Jedite turned to Malachite, ignoring the man on the floor.  “How is the Captain?” Jedite asked, taking a swig of brandy.

Malachite shook his head.  “He seems fine.  Serena isn’t giving him any trouble.”

“The girls are very attached to each other.  Lita asks everyday about them, especially Serena.” Nephrite said.

“Yes, Rei is extremely protective of Serena.” Jedite commented.

As far as Malachite was concerned the trade could not happen soon enough.  But he was worried that the Captain wouldn’t be willing to part with his prisoner.


When they reached the rendezvous point, The Tsuki was waiting.

Malachite went to stand by his Captain.  The man was softer and more gentle then he had seen since the accident that robbed his Prince of his memories.  The past month had changed something in him.  Malachite wanted those changes to remain.  No matter the trouble that had resulted from their captives, it was all worth it, if it brought their prince back.

“Malachite,” Darien said.

“Yes, Captain?”

“When we return the princess,” Darien’s eyes left the horizon and moved to the women being brought on deck.  “I am keeping Serena.”

Malachite had been dreading this moment.  “That could be a problem.”  They had deliberately kept hijinks of the other women from the Captain.  Not wanting to interrupt the transformation occurring.  “I don’t know that they will leave without her.”

“We aren’t going to give them a choice.” He stated firmly.  “The Moon Kingdom will not allow the princess to remain in danger for the sake of a lady in waiting.”

“Yes, sir.”


As Malachite had foresaw, Mina refused to even consider leaving the ship without Serena.  Reluctantly, he had convinced Darien to bring Serena up on deck.  She remained firmly at the Captain’s side, but Mina could see that she was healthy and well cared for.

Everything had settled down while they awaited the arrival of the Moon Kingdom’s representative.

As the woman stepped on deck, Malachite immediately knew they were in trouble.

The delicate woman stood tall and proud.  The scepter in her hand and crown upon her head declared to them all that the Queen of the Moon Kingdom was among them.

Malachite’s heart sunk into his stomach.  The queen looked over the girls grouped together, nodding, before turning the full force of her gaze on the Captain.  Looking at the queen, he now understood why Mina had been so concerned about Serena.  Darien had fallen for the Moon Princess.  Now what were they going to do?

Serena moved to stand before Darien.  “Mother, I’m okay.”  She looked up at Darien, “Darien would never hurt me.”

Darien’s hands settled on Serena’s shoulders, “She is staying with me.”

“I’m afraid that is not possible.” Queen Serenity replied.

The Captain’s hands tightened their grip.  “You may return to your ship now or remain aboard, but we are leaving.”

Serenity shook her head, “You aren’t going anywhere.”

“You can’t stop us.”

“Not alone, no.” The queen radiated absolute confidence.

“Captain! Captain!” all gazes rose to the crow’s nest.  “Ships converging on our location!”

The Queen and Captain stared at each other.

“We’ll take our chances.” Darien said, signaling to his officers.

“NO! Wait!” Ami cried.  She stepped forward with Zoicite at her side.  “Queen Serenity, please, the Captain is not an ordinary pirate.  He is Prince Darien of Chiba; an ally to the Moon Kingdom.”

Serena gasped.

Queen Serenity looked at Darien with shame and pity.  “My good friends, your parents, would be very disappointed in what you have become Darien.”

Malachite took a step forward drawing the Queen’s attention.  “Please forgive him.” Malachite said bowing low.  “His majesty has not been himself since the accident, that robbed us of the King and Queen, stole his memories.”

“Mother please!” Serena begged, hugging Darien close.

The Queen’s face softened as she watched her daughter’s tear filled eyes.  With a sigh she said, “Captain, release her.  Allow Serena to return.  Then you return home, say goodbye to the sea, and come visit us.  Not as the pirate, but as the Prince that you should be, and ask for her hand properly.”

Serena laughed and looked up at Darien expectantly.  His officers were not so optimistic and held still waiting.

Darien watched Serena’s smiling face with an intense stare.  Slowly he gave a small nod.


Malachite apologized to Mina. She was fully recovered from her kidnapping and having a great time.

He cocked an eyebrow, “So, who are you really, Princess?” he asked teasingly.

“Oh, I’m a princess.” She said, grinning up at him.  “I never said I was the Moon Princess.”  Mina curtsied before him, “It is a pleasure to meet you.  I am princess Mina of Venus.”

Malachite blinked rapidly, “I can’t believe we had two princesses.”

“Your treasure was greater than that,” Mina said with a laugh.  She pointed to her friends.  “They are the Princesses of Mercury, Mars, and Jupiter.”

Malachite looked at the ships ringing them.  “We didn’t really stand a chance did we?”

“No,” she grinned, “but if you’re lucky, I’ll return the favor and tie you to my bed.”